About Poker players

Six retired Irishmen were playing poker in O’Leary’s apartment when
Paddy Murphy loses $500 on a single hand, clutches his chest and
drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen brother,
the other five continue playing standing up.

Michael O’Conner looks around and asks, “Oh, me boys, someone got’s
to tell Paddy’s wife. Who will it be?”

They draw straws. Liam Gallagher picks the short one. They tell him
to be discreet, be gentle, don’t make a bad situation any worse.

“Discreet??? I’m the most discreet Irishmen you’ll ever meet.
Discretion is my middle name. Leave it to me”

Gallagher goes over to Murphy’s house and knocks on the door. Mrs.
Murphy answers and asks what he wants.

Gallagher declares: “Your husband just lost $500 and is afraid to come home”

“Tell him to drop dead!” says Murphy’s wife.

“I’ll go tell him.” says Gallagher.

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Cool pilot landing his airplane

A pilot is flying a small single engine plane with a lot of
really important execs on board into Seattle airport. There is fog so
thick that visibility is 10m, and his instruments are out. He circles
looking for a landmark and after an hour, he is low on fuel and his
passengers are very nervous.

At last, through a small opening in the fog he sees a tall building
with one guy working alone on the fifth floor.

Circling, the pilot banks and shouts through his open window: Hi,
where am I?"
The solitary office worker replies: "You're in an airplane."

The pilot executes a swift 275 degree turn and executes a perfect blind
landing on the runway five miles away. Just as the plane stops, the
engines cough and die from lack of fuel. The stunned passengers asked
the pilot how he did it.

"Simple," replies the pilot, "I asked the guy in that building a simple
question. The answer he gave me was 100 percent correct but absolutely
useless; therefore, that must be Microsoft's support office, and from
there, the airport is just 5 miles away on a bearing of 87 degrees!"

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